For different circumstances and indefinite periods of time, there are couples who do not have sexual relations, let it be because one of them suffers from an illness, or because they live in different cities or even different countries, or because of the postpartum period, etc., etc., etc., etc.
However, nowadays, there are others who voluntarily do sexual fasting, better known as sex fasting or sex detox, which is a concept put forward by the American psychotherapist, Ian Kerner.
“When it comes to sex and relationships, sometimes we get into a vicious circle and the only way to get out of it is to start again. Putting sexuality aside for 30 days is a good way to ‘reset’ our erotic side,” says Kerner.
Proponents of sex fasting believe it is good for fighting against monotony and the decrease of passion and desire in couples who have been together for many years. It is also recommended when you are getting to know someone and want to check if the relationship is only sexual.
However, not everyone agrees with this practice. Francisca Molero, director of the Ibero-American Institute of Sexology and co-director of the Institute of Sexology of Barcelona, explains whether sex detox is really a beneficial practice for couples.
Molero explains that she doesn’t agree with the idea of cutting the cord, because she considers that ending all sexual contact is not good for breaking the monotony. Instead, she states that it can be motivating for couples to prohibit some practices; that is, to abstain from sexual intercourse, but to allow kissing, caressing, oral sex or masturbation.
For the expert, the positive thing is that in the case of couples whose desire has diminished, not having sex reinforces the formerly extinguished desire: “So, when in a long relationship all those erotic signals prior to sexual intercourse have vanished and it is reduced to mechanical intercourse, this type of abstinence can help”.
In some cases, Molero forbids her patients to have intercourse: “Most of the time we forbid intercourse, not because it’s wrong, but because it’s usually what stable relationships end up being reduced to. This can result in many women not reaching orgasm or some men having erection problems. This practice may also be suitable for people who experience pain during intercourse or anorgasmia as well”.
There are many cases out there, like that of the French journalist and writer, Sophie Fontanel, who did not have sex for 12 years because although she considered that it gave her pleasure, it was not giving her happiness. From this experience, as well as learning more about herself, she wrote the book ‘The Art of Sleeping Alone’.
Sex fasting tends to be confused with strict celibacy. Sex detox is a practice that is both a personal and couple decision. Historically, sex fasting has been practised for religious or spiritual reasons, for example, during Ramadan, the Muslim holy month, when healthy adults must fast not only from food, but abstain from all sexual relations or activity from sunrise to sunset.
Among the benefits of sex detox, in addition to physical and mental ones, are greater self-control, awareness and emotional harmony. It promotes concentration, personal growth, creativity and productivity, because it avoids the distraction, energy loss and fatigue associated with sexual activity.
Science supports that frequent sexual activity benefits health by strengthening the immune system, lowering blood pressure, reducing stress levels and the risk of cardiovascular events. And while experts do not recommend total celibacy, they do endorse that sexual abstinence should be practiced for short periods of time to benefit physical and mental health.
Among the benefits are:
- Improved energy
- No risk of STIs
- Restoration of hormones in the body
- Stabilizes emotional state
- Healing of emotional wounds
- Activation of the flame of passion
- Helps with porn and masturbation addiction
- Better orgasms
Those who practice sexual fasting have found that pleasure can be magnified; not only do you get better orgasms, but it also helps testosterone production.
Imagine that you do a dietary detox to purify your body and you are without eating anything for several hours and you eat again, surely that first bite you are going to enjoy it to the fullest. So, dare to try this detox but this time in your sex life, to reach #sinrecato levels of pleasure.
Traducción del español: Catalina Oviedo Brugés
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