Liliana López is a journalist from Santa Marta, single and mother of a 25-year-old young man, who defines herself as a cheerful, outgoing and enthusiastic woman. On this occasion, our interviewee will confess to us what her life was like before getting bariatric surgery done.
“In 2018, I weighed 254 pounds. I was a size 22 in pants and 3XL in blouses, I could never find nice or decent clothes for me in a mall, because the maximum size I could find was L or XL. There comes a time when you get depressed. I didn’t see myself in the mirror, I hated it”, she says.
That was until, in that same year, with the help of several friends, she decided to get surgery done with a bariatric doctor in Barranquilla:
“I had an excellent surgeon who explained to me the pros and cons of the procedure. In one year, I went from 254 pounds to 110 because I got Covid, and then my weight regain began until I reached my current weight of 132 pounds. Today, I am a size M in a blouse and a size 10 in pants”.
Lily tells everything she went through: “In the process, the skin dries out, the hair falls out. One of the side effects I have is reflux and I control it naturally with herbal teas. I also improved my eating habits, I ate a lot of Greek yogurt to improve digestion and I became a fan of chicken soup because it increases my defenses and hemoglobin”.
Let’s talk about your childhood, were you already overweight?
As a child, I was super skinny, I didn’t like food, and I was forced to eat. My favorite food was fried eggs and fried plantain slices. My mom would take me to the pediatrician to make him perform the miracle of making me eat, but to no avail.
And when did your weight start to change?
I started to gain weight when I was a teenager. At 14, I was an adult size 12, my swimsuits and underwear were for women, not for girls. I ate without discipline because before, the more you ate, the healthier you were.
And how did you feel, did you give it importance or was it something that went unnoticed?
I didn’t care because I didn’t feel fat, only that I had a woman’s body. I liked to be flirty, and I felt comfortable looking older.
When my obesity had no turning point, I tried to go on a diet because my friends were doing it, and at home they asked me why, if it was because I was looking for a husband. Then the emotional problems came, which I never told, and they helped in my weight gain.
What was your health like before?
If I walked a lot or went up stairs, I got tired, my legs and knees hurt, I suffered from migraines. I had digestive problems and sleep apnea. I normalized my obesity for a long time because I told myself I was thick and showed another face to what I was living inside.
What was your parents’ health like?
My parents were obese. My mother died because she had a complicated condition; she had osteoarthritis, diabetes, hypertension and kidney failure. My dad was also in a bad spot, which led me to think that I didn’t want to have that kind of health.
What was your love life like?
I experienced a lot of rejection. Men idealize thin women, and not chubby women, although I had a boyfriend who preferred me fat and not skinny because I was not going to be a model or porn actress, he asked things like ‘why do you want to lose weight if that’s how I love you?’
As long as I didn’t look at myself in the mirror, I always felt beautiful, but I never had a stable relationship because of the fears and emotional conflicts that I was going through internally.
At that time, I was the one who gave her everything, to please, to buy love and I ended up begging for it, that’s why my relationships didn’t work.
When I met my son’s father, we had a relationship for 9 years, and he accepted me because he liked fat women. But in times of difficulty, I was the one doing EVERYTHING to make things work.
What is your sex life like before and after bariatric surgery?
It was always active. Interestingly, I had more suitors when I was fat than now that I lost weight, most approached me for sexual interest, it is a fetish or a sexual fantasy for some to be with a fat girl. Few approached me for a serious relationship, and in this process of valuing and loving myself, now I am more selective. My condition to do it was with the lights off out of shame. Sexuality is not only related to the body, but also to the mind.
How were you doing in the labor market?
Little by little the doors were closing on me in the labor market, not because of lack of opportunities, but because of my fatness. One boss said in a meeting: “Liliana is an excellent professional, it’s a shame she is too fat”. Another boss had my desk chair changed, because I was going to break it according to him.
Nobody called me by my name: Liliana, Lily or Lilo, as those who appreciate me the most call me, but they called me ‘FATTY’ in a mocking tone, and nobody knew what was going on inside me. Until 2018 when I said, “no more” and decided to have surgery.
The pros and cons of bariatric surgery from your experience.
On the good side, you change your lifestyle, you grow in self-esteem, I started to love myself more. In the recovery process, self-care begins, you learn to eat well and to understand that you come before others. With the procedure, I got rid of migraines, sleep apnea and even my period was regulated.
The only negative thing is that there are foods that I can’t tolerate, but, if I make a balance, there are more pros than cons.
Have you been to a psychologist? Do you recommend it?
I did not go to a psychologist, because I did not feel the need to, although I did have the accompaniment of a psychologist friend, but I do recommend that you go before the surgery and during the recovery process.
This is something new in your life; suddenly your body and your attitude change, and emotional situations that you cannot overcome alone arise, that is why professional accompaniment is necessary.
Liliana confesses that she always contemplated getting surgery, but she was afraid of the operating room and the risks of a major procedure like this one; however, what convinced her the most to take this step was finding a trusted bariatric doctor.
Today, after six years, Liliana regained her confidence and can fulfill small dreams: “I dreamed of wearing a swimsuit, the last time I wore it I was 19 years old, and I never wore them again. I didn’t go to the beach. When I did, it was something magical.
I can also wear a short dress, a spaghetti strap top, clothes that I always wanted to wear, but I didn’t feel comfortable with because I was overweight”.
Liliana says with joy that she once again has mirrors in her house and that today they call her “gorda” (tr: fatty), out of affection. Along the way, she learned to value her body and respect it.
“Self-love should be the armor against accusations, no matter if you are obese or thin, man or woman; do not let yourselves be trampled by anything or anyone. Don’t let anyone dull your shine, because each person is unique and authentic”, she expresses with satisfaction.
Traducción del español. Catalina Oviedo Brugés
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