I asked 30 people, men and women, straight and gay, of different ages, occupations, and nationalities, and, above all, very #sinrecato to share what elements are essential for 10/10 sex based on their own sexual experiences.
Get ready, because there’s a lot of information to put into practice. Of course, you might not agree with everything that’s said, or maybe you will:
Cristina, 36, from Barcelona, Spain, in a relationship.
“For me, the most important thing is to maintain that atmosphere of being a couple by going on a date. For example, going to the movies (which I love) and then ending the evening in a steamy way at his place or mine, or going to a hotel.”
Ernesto, 43, from Barranquilla, married.
“Great sex has to start before you get into bed. In my case, for example, I text her and tell her what I want her to do to me and what I want to do to her. I love that erotic, ‘sexy’ and naughty foreplay, and so does she. It really gets us going before the action even starts.”
Susana, 24, from Medellín, single.
“I like to take my time when I’m with someone. Of course, a quickie now and then isn’t bad, but for me, the ideal scenario is for both of us to be fully present, body and soul. It’s uncomfortable when the other person is more focused on their phone or the time because they have something else to do. Time shouldn’t be an excuse for not being able to enjoy each other.”
Fermín, 30, Venezuelan, single.
“I like there to be foreplay before we do it. To please him as much as I can. I think I enjoy giving pleasure more, although of course having it returned is the best.”
Roxanna, 47, Mexican, divorced.
“Sexual chemistry is very important, it’s something that goes beyond what you can see, it’s truly feeling attracted to that person, like when you have a puzzle and the pieces fit together perfectly; you don’t have to force anything. It’s a complete connection that grows stronger every time we’re together.”
Carlos, 55, from Cali, married.
“Being yourself is the key. If you’re going to bare your body, bare your soul as well. At that moment, you have to set aside all the preconceptions in your head to truly enjoy your sexuality.”
Having 10/10 sex is a subjective experience that goes beyond the physical or emotional plane. It’s not about knowing a lot of techniques or having a lot of experience, rather, it’s about there being a moment in your lives for you and that other person to share everything you feel.
What’s important to some people might not be as important to others, but there are many common elements, such as:
Safety and trust: Being with someone in a judgment-free space, where you can be yourself and explore your fantasies without inhibitions or taboos.
Assertive communication: It’s not just about talking, it’s about both of you clearly expressing when you like or dislike something and what you’d like to try. Constant feedback allows the level of intimacy and connection to grow.
Emotional intimacy: The mental and emotional connection is just as important as the physical one. Affection and shared vulnerability make every sexual encounter unique.
Patience and exploration: Foreplay is very important in a sexual relationship. Proper stimulation for both men and women helps prolong the experience until intercourse.
Mindfulness: To truly enjoy the moment, you must be present, focused on what you’re feeling, without external distractions.
Remember that having great sex with your partner doesn’t depend on what others say, it depends on your preferences, what you feel, and how you feel it. We all have very different routines, ages, occupations, and other factors, which makes every sexual experience unique and personal.
If the perfect moment hasn’t come yet, don’t wait for it, make it happen. And most importantly, don’t let time pass you by and go ahead and embrace #sinrecato experiences.
Traducción del español: Catalina Oviedo Brugés
